Do It Again
by RinsDarkMagician
Summary: After Freud comforts Shiro through the devastating events at the expo, he must do it again. YAOI
1. Do It Again

**So I read volume 3 and part of volume 4 the other day and I completely fangirled. I had a major fangasm during a part in volume 4 and this story kinda reflects it. This story is short and sweet and fluffy though I'm not sure if I want to do another chapter to it. I kinda do...we'll see where it goes. Until then, please enjoy ^_^**

It had been a long and terrible day. People died on this day. Students, teachers, guests…people were dead. And there was nothing anyone could do about it. It wasn't supposed to be like this. The expo was supposed to go on as normal. It would have been Shiro's first time seeing it! He wanted to see his friends put on their presentations, especially Ikkyu's. He looked funny and Shiro wanted a good laugh. That didn't happen.

Instead people died…she died.

Joan of Arc.

She didn't wake up expecting to die that day. She woke up expecting to change her destiny! That was the cruel irony of it. She never did escape her destiny. She died the same way her original did. And now she was gone and Shiro would never see her or speak to her again.

He felt defeated as he sat and stared at the people putting a barricade around the cross where Joan was burned. He didn't even know what he was thinking. He just sat there, stunned and silent. He didn't even realize someone had sat down next to him. The person gently put an arm around him and pulled him into a light embrace.

He didn't even look at the person. He couldn't tear his eyes away from the cross. Yet, he somehow knew exactly who the person was.

"Freud," he said in a quiet voice.

He felt Freud's hand tighten on his arm. Shiro started talking. He didn't hear himself. He didn't know what he was saying. He didn't care. Freud was a good listener so Shiro just spoke and cried.

He didn't know how much time had passed since Freud joined him. Night had fallen and he felt Freud stand up, taking Shiro with him. Shiro had all but forgotten about Pandora. The girl woke up when she felt Shiro move. Freud held her hand and led her along with the zombie-like Shiro. He brought them to Shiro's room and gently set him on the bed.

"If you need anything, you know where to find me," Freud said before leaving with Pandora.

It took Shiro a moment to realize he was even in his own room. He spread out on the bed, Joan's face flashing in his mind. She wanted to live. She wanted to live so badly. He didn't understand why it had to be her to die. Out of everyone at that school why did she have to be one of the ones to die?

He wiped away his tears. He sat for a bit longer, trying to will his body to sleep. It didn't work. He gathered his thoughts and he remembered what Freud had said to him before he left. Freud wouldn't naturally be his first person to go to when he wanted a friend, but he was the only one right now. He got up and left, at first heading for Freud's room. When he was halfway there he decided to turn around and head for the pool room instead. He didn't know why, he just went where his legs took him.

He stepped inside the pool room and immediately noticed Freud lying on one of the couches. The clone looked over and sat up.

"I couldn't sleep." Shiro said walking in and shutting the door behind him.

"I'm not surprised."

Shiro sat down next to Freud. He blinked a few times and cleared his mind so he could take in his surroundings. He looked at one of the other couches and noticed Pandora fast asleep. Then he saw that Freud was dressed in pajamas and that they were sitting on a large quilt.

"You're going to sleep in here?" Shiro asked.

Freud nodded. "I certainly couldn't sleep in my own room with the little girl."

"Oh," Shiro said. He was right. Perhaps when he saw them he could talk to one of the girls about keeping Pandora at night.

The two men were silent, though Shiro wanted to scream. He wanted to grab Freud around his waist and sob into his chest. He may have been dead to the world when Freud first came to him, but he had recognized the contact of another being and he craved it again. However, he was not in a state of mind to realize that Freud knew he wanted to be touched.

Freud looked him up and down. It didn't take a psychoanalyst to see that Shiro really needed another person. He pushed down the flutters in his stomach and his heart as he reached over and pulled Shiro into another embrace. This one was different from the first one. Freud could tell that Shiro was over the shock of Joan dying and now moved onto the mourning process. The boy grabbed roughly onto Freud's shirt and hid his face in it. He feebly attempted to hide his tears. Once again, Freud said nothing. He just listened to the sounds of Shiro's sobs.

It was instinct for someone to try to comfort a friend. It was in every person's nature to want to help out a friend. Freud knew the ins and the outs of the human mind and psyche and he knew that the feeling he had within himself was just because he wanted to help Shiro. He tried his best to use his reasoning skills to convince himself that his libido was going wild simply because of his extreme desire to help his friend. That was it. Nothing more than that.

So he relied on that sound reasoning as he lightly kissed Shiro on the top of his head. He knew Shiro felt it from the way he tensed up, but he quickly relaxed again. Freud dared to do it again when he noticed Shiro's crying had calmed down. He kissed his head two more times until Shiro's crying had dwindled down to hiccups and sniffs. He didn't know what to do next. He really wasn't the type to make people feel better after a horrible tragedy. He did the only thing that seemed to make sense. He got ready for bed.

He adjusted himself so Shiro could hold onto him and rest his head on his chest. He pulled the blanket over the two of them and reached to turn off the lamp, though the moon shined through and illuminated the room. He didn't expect to sleep easy and he didn't expect Shiro to sleep either, yet he still closed his eyes and waited to see if sleep would take him over. He took a few deep breaths to relax himself when he felt something wet against the side of his face. He turned his head to see Shiro staring at him. As they looked at each other Shiro once again kissed the side of his face.

"Thank you," he whispered. "For everything."

He rested his head back on Freud's chest and held him tightly. Freud just lay there. None of his years of research and analysis could have prepared him for actually experiencing a true sexual desire for one person and…love? He decided to wait until the morning to try to decipher it all. He just held tightly to Shiro and gently rubbed his hair. Surprisingly, the boy fell asleep, probably just out of exhaustion from thinking too much and seeing too much. It wasn't long until Freud followed his lead and fell asleep, his last thoughts on how he wanted to truly kiss Shiro.

* * *

><p>The doors to the pool room opened and Ikkyu, Elizabeth, and Nightingale stepped in. Shiro and Freud hadn't been in their rooms or the infirmary so the next best place to check was their hang out. The three friends stopped abruptly as they saw Shiro cuddled in the arms of Freud, both of the fast asleep.<p>

"That's…unexpected," Ikkyu said.

Nightingale nodded, a slight smile forming on her face. "I guess they were both just tired from last night. We all are. Let's let them rest."

"Sure," Ikkyu said, leading the ladies out of the room and shutting the door. "But I'm telling Napoleon. And when things get back to normal I will not let them live this down."

**So I've reread this several times and there's just not enough...stuff in here for me haha. It's missing a lot so I need to fix that. It's cute and all but I have a feeling there will be a chapter 2. Doubt it will go past 2 but I think there will be one ^_^ In order for me to really like this story I'll need to add more. Do you think so? ^_^ Anyway, if you read it, please review it and I will see you next time! For the clones! **


	2. Love In The Time Of Science

_**I wasn't sure how I felt about this chapter. I was soooo critical but I gave it to a friend to read and she confirmed that...it was good! haha! So I hope everyone else enjoys it as much as she did. Freud is...extremely difficult to write dialogue for so...just know this was hard haha. Enjoy ^_^**_

Regardless of how many days passed it was impossible to forget what happened on the day of the expo. It didn't take even a week for classes to start again, meaning the students would have to forget their worries and start focusing on their classwork again. Freud could see his friends struggling with how quickly they were forced to return to their normal lives. Freud himself was curious as to why the school didn't even bother to give an explanation as to what happened that day. Yet he accepted it and figured that it would only be a matter of time before the truth revealed itself.

Until then he had other things to worry about. His schoolwork was starting to stack on top of each other and he couldn't let that happen. He tried to focus on some math, but it just wasn't working. He wished he couldn't focus because he was too disturbed about the expo, but that wasn't the case. He couldn't focus because a certain boy kept running circles in his head.

Since the night of the expo he had been worried about Shiro's state. The boy had so much to think about and so much on his mind. Also Pandora seemed to cling to him like she would never let him go so he never really had a moment of privacy. Freud nearly offered to do Shiro's homework for him if it would grant him some relief. He wanted to help him in any way he could.

Also since that day he noticed little changes between him and Shiro. They weren't completely obvious and if one weren't paying attention then they would go unnoticed. Freud even imagined that Shiro had no idea about those little changes. However, Freud could see them. He noticed the light touches and the shy glances Shiro would give him. He noticed how he would make an effort to stand next to him or sit next to him in the pool room or the cafeteria. He noticed how when they would walk next to each other Shiro would brush against him every so often.

Shiro was still mourning Joan and Freud was very aware of it. All of his research told him that Shiro would instinctively find someone to take care of him and be there with him through his mourning process. Anything that happened during that time would strictly be while he was out of his usual mind so anything like kissing or touching or any words of affection were simply a way to express sadness. One way to express mourning was through sexual advances, such as touching, and Shiro seemed to be doing that whether he noticed it or not. It was fine with Freud though. He had read all about it in books. He knew eventually Shiro would calm down and get over his mourning and things would be back to normal.

Freud was fine with it.

He was perfectly okay with that.

So Freud didn't understand that terrible feeling in his chest when he thought about it. He knew what Shiro was going through. He understood the mourning process and the way Shiro reached out to him. It was all mental. Shiro couldn't control what he was doing. Freud understood that. Mourning was difficult and getting closer to another person, even while mourning meant getting closer to them sexually and emotionally as well. Freud understood that!

That feeling in his chest turned to actual pain. Freud grabbed his chest and stood from his desk to go and lie on his bed. He didn't understand what he was feeling. It hurt so much. Images of Shiro kept flying through his mind and the pain only intensified.

"It's not fair," Freud whispered.

What wasn't fair? He didn't know why he said that. He took a deep breath to try to get himself together. What was he saying? What wasn't fair?

"He…he can't do that to me," Freud said. He shook his head. Do what? His mind was a clutter of thoughts and emotions he had never felt before. He couldn't get his mind to form any single thought. He opened his mouth and let the words fly out.

"He can't do this to me. He keeps…teasing me! He can't just tease me and then when he's finally done mourning just up and leave! It's not fair to me! What about me? I feel…something for him! I feel…something…."

Freud drifted off. He didn't dare say what he thought that feeling was. It scared him. There was nothing in his research that mentioned these kinds of feelings. He thought about writing down what was going on with him, but quickly shot down the idea. He wasn't in the mood to report his own personal emotions. He just wanted to sort them out.

He decided to stop thinking entirely and get out for some air. He walked through the halls of the school doing everything he could to get Shiro out of his mind. He hated that feeling in his chest. He wanted nothing more than for it to go away. He slowly dragged himself along, recalling all of his research and trying to find an explanation for the feeling, the pain, in his chest. He just couldn't place it.

Instead of going outside he found himself walking into the pool room. He stopped short as he saw Shiro staring out of the large window.

"Oh, Freud!" Shiro said, a warm smile forming on his face. "What's up?"

Freud suddenly regretted going to the pool room. "N-nothing," he stuttered out. "I'll leave you alone."

"No!" Shiro shouted. He awkwardly looked around, embarrassed at his sudden outburst. "Why don't you stay here with me? Come on."

Shiro patted the empty space next to him on the couch and watched as Freud hesitantly made his way over. They sat together in silence, neither of them sure of what to say. Freud did his best to read Shiro's body language, but he couldn't decipher anything at all. Shiro seemed so normal today. Was he done mourning Joan? It seemed a little early to him, but perhaps Shiro had moved on from the sadness and decided to continue with his life. The thought unsettled him, but he wanted nothing more than for Shiro to get over his sadness. He wanted him to be happy.

Frued sighed deeply and leaned over, scratching his head.

"Is something wrong, Freud?"

Freud immediately sat up, his eyes wide and staring at the wall. "Nothing," he said quickly.

"Oh…." Shiro said. He waited a bit before asking him again. "Are you sure? You seem to have a lot on your mind."

Freud chuckled as he leaned back on the couch. "I think we all have a lot on our minds, no?"

"Yeah, we do," Shiro said, leaning back with him. "But you seem to have…something different on your mind. You don't seem as distressed about the expo as everyone else. I know you're thinking about it, but I think there's something else on your mind."

"Are you trying to psychoanalyze me now?"

Shiro smirked and shrugged. "I guess if that's what it'll take to get you to talk to me." He reached over and hugged Freud, mimicking the hug he was given that first day at the expo. He felt Freud tense up and started getting confused when he didn't relax again.

"Well…I guess…." Freud started speaking and then took a long pause. Shiro patiently waited for him to continue. Freud was never one to be at a loss for words so there definitely was something big on his mind. However, when Freud finally did begin speaking Shiro could barely make out what he was saying. He was speaking so quickly and in a way Shiro didn't understand at all.

"You are obviously mourning Joan of Arc and I can appreciate that, Shiro. I was there for you in your time of need and in doing so you clung to me instead of people you would typically trust more," Freud said. "Yet, also by choosing me to be the one you go to you took our relationship from friends to confidants. When you increase the level of a relationship certain aspects of it also increase such as emotions and sexual desires, regardless if you're aware of the change or not. We've obviously become more affectionate with each other and that's simply because your libido increases when you see me because you know you can trust me with your deepest emotions and when you're at your worst. My libido is responding to your raging libido and they continue to bounce off of each other to the point where we desire each other for more than just a confidant. Now, if we delve into a mourning mind and the mind of the most trusted ally we can see that-"

Freud was abruptly cut off due to Shiro's hand moving from his arm to cover his mouth. He moved his eyes around quickly and listened as Shiro spoke slowly and quietly.

"I'm going to take my hand away from your mouth…and when I do you will not say a word."

Shiro slowly took his hand away and gave a sigh of relief when Freud said nothing more. He took a moment to carefully choose his words before speaking.

"I don't have any idea what you just said, Freud." Shiro started. "That wasn't clear to me at all."

He ignored the annoyed look on Freud's face as he stood and pushed a chair closer to the couch. He sat on it and crossed one leg over the other, giving Freud a mischievous smile.

"I think I will do a psychoanalysis on you, but we're going to do this my way, not yours. I don't understand your way anyway. All I want you to do is lie down on the couch there and tell me what's on your mind. The truth about what's on your mind…not that…mumbo jumbo you just spouted out a second ago."

Freud stared at him for moment, knowing perfectly well that Shiro was serious. He didn't really want to play along, but he decided to amuse Shiro. He lay on the couch and crossed his hands over his stomach. He stared at the ceiling while trying to gather his thoughts.

"What are you thinking?" Shiro asked quietly.

"You're mourning and you came to me for help so your libido grows stronger when you-"

"Stop, stop! None of that!" Shiro interrupted. "I don't want to know about what your research is telling you. I want to know what is going through your head. Tell me what you don't want to tell me."

Freud took a deep breath. He didn't know what he didn't want to tell him. That feeling in his chest maybe?

"It's just that all of my research…isn't helping me this time. I understand that when we're together we feel strongly for each other because our relationship has grown from simple school friends to trusting each other when we're at our most vulnerable. Our libidos play a huge role in that and our desire to be around each other has grown as well. We trust each other more. But when you're done mourning…you won't need me anymore. We'll slowly dwindle back down to just two school friends and…."

"And?" Shiro said after a moment passed with Freud saying nothing else.

"And I don't want that." Freud put a hand to his chest and closed his eyes. "I have this feeling in my chest and it hurts. It hurts so much especially when I think you'll soon forget how I was there for you. My chest feels light and airy when I think about how you need me and want to be near me and want to touch and hug me…and then it hurts so, so much when I think about how you won't need me anymore. It's not fair. It's not fair that you'll just leave me all alone!"

Shiro lowered his head. He didn't know what to think. He knew that there was no way the two of them would ever go back to the way things were. That would absolutely not happen at least if he had anything to do it with. "Is that what your research is telling you?" Shiro asked.

Freud waited a moment before speaking. "It tells me how the mourning process goes and how it affects our relationship. It doesn't explain this feeling in my chest; the pain I feel when I think you'll leave or the lightness I feel when I think we'll stay this way forever. I don't know what it is."

Freud lifted his body up some when he felt Shiro sit on the couch. Shiro stared at the floor, not daring to look at his friend.

"I'll never forget what you did for me the day of the expo," Shiro said quietly. "I mean…you were the most unexpected person to show up. I seriously would have expected anyone else but you to be there and comfort me. But…even in all the chaos you did think of me and you remembered me. You found me and you stayed with me. You let me sleep with you so I wouldn't be alone. You took care of me and I can promise you I'll never forget that. So your research was wrong in saying that I would."

Freud sat up fully, intrigued at what Shiro was saying.

"Also, I think I'm still mourning Joan, but I know that I do need to keep moving on. I need to keep going with my life and as much as it hurts I know it needs to be done. Even when I'm 'done' mourning, I'll still be here with you. There's no reason why we have to go back to the way things were just because I decided I need to keep living. I think you've become a large part of my life and I won't leave you by yourself."

Freud almost didn't believe the words coming from Shiro's mouth. He wasn't following the layout his research had set out at all. The things Shiro was saying completely contradicted every ounce of research Freud had done.

"Also," Shiro started. He touched Freud's cheek with one hand and smiled at the confused and almost scared look he got from the clone. "Your research won't ever be able to explain that feeling in your chest. Love is something you must experience on your own. It's not something you can just read about in a book."

"Love?"

Shiro nodded. "Go ahead and say it."

Freud knew what he was talking about. He didn't want to say it. It seemed so strange for him. This feeling made no logical sense whatsoever. How was he supposed to even begin to comprehend it? He looked Shiro in the eyes and realized his answer was right in front of him. Shiro understood emotions better than he did. It would have to be Shiro to help him understand everything that was going inside him.

"I…I love you…." Freud said in barely a whisper.

Shiro smiled widely and cupped Freud's face in both of his hands. "I love you too." He pressed their foreheads together and rested his lips on top of Freud's while speaking to him. "I'll bet your libido is going insane right now, isn't it?"

Freud didn't bother to respond as he pressed his lips harder against the other's. Shiro ran his tongue against Freud's mouth and Freud quickly and willing opened it without a moment's hesitation. Freud was confused to say the least. Shiro was never this calm or cool. He supposed (according to his research) that Shiro knew how ignorant Freud was when it came to the topic of love and emotions and he found himself being the dominant male, giving him an extra boost of confidence.

Freud didn't care. As long as Shiro kept kissing him the way he was doing, he could survive without research or logic. He had Shiro now, who was willing to teach him and be with him every step of the way. After all, one half of research was book work and the other half was real world experience.

**_So...how did you like it? *cringes* I know one person in the world thinks it's good...review?_**


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